How to Size for Eddie

Transcribed Audio:

Welcome back to Tool Talk. Now, in case you’re just joining us today, we’re going over an ED device called Eddie, interestingly enough, and how to properly measure yourself for it, okay.

Quick question for you. So, do I just wear this around all the time? Do I just show it to others while I’m out shopping? Is there—

No, no.

–use it at a moment’s notice?

You only wear Eddie for a half-hour at a time.

Oh, all right, all right, all right. Well done, well done. So, let’s get down to brass tacks and figure this out so I can order one of my own. Now, how do I—well, how do I put this? Is it school-boy bathroom style, maybe with a ruler, is there some way I can put a mark on it and just get a string in there and—

Yes. And, also, very much no. The process is pretty specific. Eddie is available in four sizes. So, using a measuring tape or a string, measure the circumference around the base of the shaft of the penis. Now, do not measure the length or the width. And if you’re using a string, then you can just mark where the string is and then measure that with a ruler after. While measuring with the measuring tape, it should feel snug against your penis. But it should not be too tight as to cut the circulation or create constriction.

Don’t want that.

No. You can do this while either flaccid or erect. Oh, for you, that means soft or hard.

I know what flaxseed does, all right? That being said, do you want to see what I got?

No, no. That’s between you and Giddy who keeps all sizing results discreet.

What were your numbers? What was yours—what did you get?

Why would I tell you that?

All right. I’ll tell you what. Let me go again because I was thinking about my mother-in-law. I drank some cold water and it just…

Actually, you know what? That’s a good point. In the event that you’ve ordered the wrong size, Giddy will happily provide a resize for a small fee since, you know, these are medical ED devices and because of the nature of use, they are unreturnable.

Unreturnable. It’s just sort of a one-off then. I can’t arbitrarily just offer it up to people on the street or to the rest of my bowling team? Just share-and-share-alike.

Please, don’t do that.

Okay, all right.

If anything, you should change your ED device after every sexual partner.

Really? Hah.

So besides anymore nonsense from him, that concludes our Giddy 101, How to Use Video Series. You should have all the info you need to get started. Thank you for your support and here’s to getting back to Giddy in the bedroom.

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